Allow Me to Do Anything but Actually Introduce Myself

Right, so I’m the new contributor/ADMINISTRATOR, and you just know I’m going to bring a sense of legitimacy to this virtual pile of media vomit with a last name like “Loserman,” the same way a young folk singer knew everyone would respect him with the last name “Zimmerman,” but changed it to “Dylan” anyway, just to fuck with people (by whom I mean his parents, who probably felt distanced from their little Bobby.  Nothing sets parents stomping around the house in an impotent rage more than forsaking their name and saying you’ll never go back to your hometown again.  Psh, parents.).

So strap yourselves in, space cadets–this recent college grad has no prospects besides basic unemployment, a constant hangover and a chip on her well-formed shoulder.  That wasn’t an off-handed compliment to myself, it’s just science.

–Sarah